Everyone deals with anger from time to time. Whether at home, in the workplace, or in your car, one of life’s most basic facts is that things are going to happen that get under your skin. How you deal with that anger is what makes all the difference. Being unable to manage and control anger can lead to numerous problems including issues with relationships, your career, and even the law. Some people can handle their anger with ease – it’s simply a personality trait they’re lucky enough to have. Others need help. If you find that you constantly lose control of your anger, here are some tips that will help you reel it in.
The most common technique used to help manage and control anger is also the most well known. Deep breathing exercises really do work to help you calm yourself. Whether you’ve just been cut off in traffic or about to confront a co worker who angered you, you should spend a moment to focus on your breathing. Take deep breaths and focus on each one as it enters and leaves your lungs. Practice will tell you how long you should do this for. A minute is usually enough to calm many people down, but if you need to use more time do. Essentially this is a form of meditation used for centuries, and with good reason. Deep breathing is effective at calming yourself.
If you are in the midst of confrontation and find yourself being overwhelmed by anger, deep breathing techniques may not be enough to control your anger. You will need to get away from the stimulus that is infuriating you, at least long enough to calm yourself down. In most cases you can simply walk away, such as in an argument with your spouse or children. Other instances may require more tact, such as when being berated by a supervisor. Walking away may result in losing your job, so consider working on techniques to help you escape the situation for a moment. This can be done by asking to go to the restroom, for example. Once away from the source of your anger, focus again on your breathing.
Combining these two basic methods is usually enough to help control anger. For most people, a few moments of tranquility and focusing on their breathing is enough to calm down. Once you’re calm, review the situation as rationally as possible before returning to the confrontation. Think about the consequences of losing your cool and how important the argument really is. In most cases you will see that letting your anger get the upper hand isn’t in your best interests. When you’re centered and ready, you can return to deal with the confrontation at hand. But never be afraid to take a moment to control your anger.